WWJD May 8, 2007

Okay Dear Readers, no one asked for advice via WWJD Tuesday but, but, I sense a need for comforting words for a lot of my friends. So...I am going to give some (semi) unsolicited advice. Here goes.

There are a lot (A LOT) of things in this world that I don't understand. Illness, poverty (in a country that wastes more than any other, ever!), abuse (substance, emotional, physical, etc), just to name a few. Despite my best efforts I have been unable to avoid all of these things in my life so far. I am not even sure that I have learned anything from these bad/sad yet unavoidable things. If I press myself to remember the times I have dealt with these things.... I still don't know what I took away from my experiences except a sense of experience. For better or for worse I now know what it is like to watch someone get diagnosed with cancer and then to die from it in 6 months, despite (or because of?) surgery and chemo. I know what it looks like to watch someone throw their life down the hole because of substance abuse, physical abuse, and emotional abuse. I know what it looks like for people to be up to their eyeballs in debt and have no way out. What does all this experience give me? It gives me a goal. A goal to strive toward. A goal to reach for even when it feels impossible. My goal that I reach for when I feel down is simple. Keep going, keep reaching, keep believing that at some point, in some way, things will get better, somehow. That's it. Cheesy, optimistic, sugary, whatever. And what fuels my goal?

Her


And him


And them


















They are all worth it, they are all worth sticking around to see what will happen next. To hear the laughter, to see the smiles, to feel the hugs. So to my friends that I know are suffering right now, I hope that you find your goal and your fuel.

Response to WWJD

Alright Dear Readers here we go! I am so excited!! Thank you Cara for bringing your problem forward for advice, I will do my best.

"Hi Jen (ok, so I knew that), I have a problem. I have been a member of a mothers group for almost two years, and I enjoy attending and making friends, but I have an issue. The parent organization is a christian group, which I was aware of, and was not concerned, and the group is sponsored by a local church. Childcare is voluntary and mostly through the church members. After the last meeting I went to pick up my child, and she had a Crown with a christian message printed large on it. I am not a christian, and I don't really want them indoctrinating my child in a religion I don't share. Should I simply stop attending, without saying why, or should I quietly speak to one of the steering committee on my reasons for leaving, and ask if the religious subjects be toned down in childcare? WWJenD?"

First off I am just like you. I am not religious and I have a hard time navigating among the "saved" as well. As far as your question of stopping cold turkey or speaking to the steering committee I would talk to the committee. In the last 9 months I have really come to realize the importance of having mommy friends. Real friends and mommy friends are sometimes one and the same but most of the time (at least for me) they are separate. I have found that even if I have different religious beliefs, or political beliefs, I need friends that understand what it is like to go through this crazy shit that we call motherhood. And despite our many differences I really enjoy and find satisfaction in commiserating with my mommy friends. I have even had the lucky experience of having one of my mommy friends become my real friend. And she and I couldn't be more opposite on politics and religion.

So my advice to you is to try to make the whole thing work because in the end you are the only one that can indoctrinate your child, one paper crown ain't gonna do it. Ask BK if you have any doubts. =)

Keep the questions coming ya'll, I'll post responses every Tuesday from now on.

WWJD

Well Dear Readers I feel like sharing more with you all. So here goes...my name is Jen. Whew, that was a relief. No more concealing my name, my moniker, my nomenclature de moi. So in honor of my soul baring I want to make today, Tuesday (and all other Tuesdays), a special day. So I give you...

WWJD: What Would Jen Do

I am Jen and I will answer your questions, so leave a problem/dilemma/wondering/mystery in the comments (or email me) and I will answer your query as best I can.

All names/email addys/etc will be confidential unless you want to bare your soul, like I did today. =)

Welcome to Tuesdays at Letters About Eve!

p.s. this was shamelessly stolen from Ms. Britt. Go check her out, she is vulgar, honest, sassy, in short everything that I am after a few drinks ;)